Corpse Fishing

i once tried to swim in a moat
when i drowned my corpse started to bloat
some guy fished me out
and baked me with trout
and fed me to his little fat goat

Violence and Vegetables

there once was a vagina named spud,
who was a potato that bled out its blood
one day it went to sleep
and bled all over a sheep
"baahhh, i'm a tampon for spud"

A Vengeful Poem

there once was a whiny mcgee
who demanded a poem writing spree
so this was done out of spite and fun
so suck my sexy poem greatness

Wherefore out thou, spikeo?

Once there was a little goldfish. Let's call him Bob. Bob was a sexy goldfish with lots of friends and a cool fake castle in his tank. Bob rocked. He rocked the socks off that castle.
But this isn't about the castle. This is about Spikeo, the lost love of Bob. When Bob first came home in a plastic sack from the pet shop, his owners carried him through the kitchen, past the sexiest creature alive. So poised, such amazing hair, and such a complexion. What beauty! And Bob was infatuated with this mystery creature. Bob longed for Spikeo, who happened to be a pineapple...
And then one day, CHOP. Spikeo was sliced up and put on skewers.
CHOMP. Devoured by Bob's owners. How could they???
Bob cried and cried until his bowl water was so salty that you could hardly notice the poo and slime anymore. Some other fish died. Bob didn't care. Spikeo was gone. Forever.
Bob never wanted to love again. It would just end in tragedy. So he cried more and more to try to salt the other fish to death. Bob became a serial killer. Things got really weird and he started eating from the other fish bodies.
Bob became obsessed with death and started his own creepy corpse rituals deep inside the once-sexy castle. Very unsexy rituals. He started building a replica Spikeo out of fish poo and bits of the friends he had salted to death with his tears.
Bad Bob.
Sad Bob.
Foul blob of pineapple shaped wisdom.
No happy ending here.

It That Shall Not Be Named

there once was a cock from mans-underwear
who thought it could go and walk..over-there
it grew a big bunch
of hair and had lunch
and then it vomited - BLERRRRGH